Monday, April 2, 2012

I do because I love you!

Motherhood has taught me the real meaning of patience & sacrifice. There are days when I'm so drained, mentally & physically, but when Ashayr starts crying and demands my attention, I just have to give in and give him my all. I'm the sort who needs straight 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. I remember the first month being so challenging. The lack of sleep made me really cranky. However, as days go by, I learn to love Ashayr even more and would give up anything for him, including my precious sleep. I really do not know how some working mothers do this. To care for their children and still perform well at work. It's just amazing. Now that I'm going through motion, everything seems to be a routine. Motherhood has indeed changed me into a better woman. I give without expecting anything in return.

Becoming a mother is a role that one should be mentally and psychologically prepared for. However, this motherhood thing was NEVER taught in school. You assume the role once you give birth and you just learn. Unfortunately no matter how much one prepares for motherhood, we are not always ready for the relentless crying, sleepless nights, unknown ailments and everything else that comes with the baby package. Some of us develop coping mechanisms, others research to be better informed, and others have a great support system. My husband and mother has got to be my pillars of strength. Without them, I would have crashed. Motherhood has been overwhelming, but I'm coping really well. Alhamdulillah. Biarlah tak cukup tidur, asalkan Ashayr selesa, sihat dan sempurna. I do all these because I love you. 

Of course there are times when i would beat myself up for not being able to be SuperMama. This happens each time I compare myself with other mothers. Comparing doesn't help and I've learnt to STOP doing it. I know I can be the best mother for my children and i am NOT going to pressure myself unnecessarily. Whatever is the case, motherhood comes with a certain delight that is better EXPERIENCED than told. I feel that there is no one size fits all method. Such things DON'T exist in motherhood. Do what you believe is best for your baby, you and your family.

I'm proud to be Ashayr's Mama. At 5 and a half months, he is such a happy and responsive baby. I shall continue showering him with lots of love and kisses (and lesser toys). I may not be the best mother in the world. But I know that each day, I am doing my best to be the BEST mother that he will ever have. Baby Ashayr, I love you! 

In any case, Ashayr will be in the Mother's Day edition of Manja magazine, this May! My baby was such a professional and he barely cried and did not throw any tantrums during the 8 hour long photoshoot! Steady la Sayang! Can't wait to see the final product!! ;)

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