when i was a teenager, i've always wondered how nice it would be to grow up, find my prince charming, get married, have lots of wonderful children and live happily ever after. yes, that was the ideal.
but as i grow up, reality strikes and slams you in the face. fairytales don't exist. you need to make belief and find happiness in the passing moments of your lives. despite the responbilities that i carry once adulthood beckons, i know deep in my heart that someday, i will create my own family.. something is might not be perfect but almost close to perfection.
along came haris. God sent. my sister got divorced and this boy was stuck in between. i told my aunt that we should take him in. that i would take care of him and provide for him. just like how my aunt took me and my two siblings in when my parents got divorced. haris has always been a happy baby. easy to take care of. he brought so much joy to the family.
today, he is 7 and has been such an amazing son to me. he reminds me alot of myself. how much i try to be "perfect" so that i can make my aunt happy. i see me in haris. a child that tries very hard to do his best and not disappoint those whom he loves.
(he likes to pose for pictures and so did i when i was 7.)
(he loves food and so do i till now!)
when i'm sad, he gives me random hugs and tell me that everything is going to be ok. when i'm sleeping, he would pull up the blanket and cover me. randomly, he will smile at me, assuring me that he loves me.. "mama, i love you a million percent." yes, my son. i know you do. he will always be my number one baby.
now, i'm expecting a child. my first, but second to haris. i don't know how he will deal with another sibling. it scares me sometimes but i know that haris will take it positively. he rubs my tummy and talks to the baby. "adik, don't kick mama so much ok. adik must behave.".. "adik, what are you doing? are you sleeping or awake?"... "hello adik.. this is abang haris. which side of the tummy are you at now?"
as much as i can, hisham and i try to get haris involved in conversations about the baby being around in october. haris has been receptive so far, alhamdulillah. my handsome boy will be a big brother. i know he is up for the challenge. i have faith in him. =)
for now, at 6 months and 7 kilos heavier, the baby kicks are getting stronger. just a couple of days ago, i felt the baby hiccups. it's a funny feeling i can't describe. weird but nice. oh, and swollen & gigantic feet! thanks to the endless walking in melaka during the school holidays.. ahh.. the "perks" of pregnancy. but it's still alright cos my husband says that i am still the most beautiful pregnant woman on earth.. =P heee... i love you Sayang!!
so far so good. according to the gestational calendar, i've got slightly over 12 weeks more to go! time to seriously pen down the shopping list and get shopping!
anyway, so many have been asking if it's a boy or a girl.. the husband and i are still keeping mum. it's a suprise! but what's your guess? cast your votes on the poll that can be found on left bar of my blog! kita tengok siapa yang tepat! ;)